bachelorette bash : india

in light of my blogging absence,
i've found myself with a number of photos and stories that i can't stand to keep from you.
therefore, i plan to sporadically toss in some oldies.
i will denote a post as such with the following graphic:

(because this is a "catch up" post)
(and because it makes me think of french fries)

perhaps i never mentioned this, but i managed to put together a team of awesomeness in the form of my bridesmaids.
these girls like totally tore it up on the wedding front.
they planned me an entirely surprise bachelorette party that was travel themed!
first, i received this invitation in the mail:
it's a boarding pass!
(crafted by our very own kristen barstad of lullaby lubbock)
that literally made my life complete.

i had no idea where we were going, but i was told by shannon (our number one hostess) that i should bring a swimsuit, a "cute" outfit, comfy clothes, and a bohemian outfit.
most of these, for me, are the same thing.
so i got excited.

i woke up early friday morning and drove to dallas.
after a quick trip to my hair salon for a little coloring, i headed to my parents house where the girls were meeting. i ran upstairs to get ready and before i knew it, the house was full of all my favorite females!

once everyone was there, we walked outside and boarded...
the party bus.

of course there was champagne.
(and penis sucker rings)
my cousins were there!
my friends were there!
and we were fully stocked with jello shots.
i was given all of the usual bachelorette attire.
a quick 100 jello shots and four bottles of champagne later,
we arrived at lake granbury!
my aunt and uncle have a house there, and it was technically our destination...
oh but there were so many other places we went!

we were given passports along with amazing goodie bags.
the bags were put together by my mom.
they were so cute!
 inside the beach bags, there was a towel that said "the perfect mix,"
a huge sack of candy,
a water bottle,
and an overnight bag full of the essentials
(soap, shampoo, puffy eye patches, and ADVIL!)
the passports (also by kristen)
told us the rundown of the weekend.
they looked just like real passports!
there was a map, a photo of me, and even stamps!
as you can see, friday night we traveled to india.
the entry had all of our room assignments hanging with these little mini pinatas.
 it was so cute!
i was told to find my room and get ready to go to india.
we were all given bindis (that thing stuck to my forehead) to get us in the spirit of india.
i came outside and found the most beautiful table i've ever seen!
there were bright colors everywhere and candles and flowers!
we were all so excited!
(and slightly feeling the jello shots and champagne)
you can see those big umbrellas in the back.
they were decorated with ribbons and lanterns.
shannon is the party planner above all party planners.
i did a very typical drunk lindsey dance.
they made cups with the logo that said
"around the world with lindsey"
more champagne!
there were menus with all the dinner items,
and then out came dinner.
wow! it was amazing.
shannon had gluten free cupcakes made.
they had little tiny bras and panties on them.
my girls!
then it came time for the lingerie shower.
someone geniusly used a boa as wrapping.
it got passed around.
i was truly showered with amazing gift after amazing gift,
but i'm not going to show you any of them..
then out came the hookah!
and then the night got fuzzy...
it ended up with all of us in the hot tub, and possibly one of us in the ice cold pool...

india was magical!
here it is in the daylight:

**thank you to heather for taking every single photo**

(more on the bachelorette party to come)


rainy days in paradise

parrot cay has proven to be one of the less lively places we've ever stayed.
the other hotel guests are extremely boring and bordering rude.
we have tried a handful of times to make conversation with them
and we have been SHUT DOWN at each attempt.
last night, andrew tried to chat with the only other human at the bar about the red stripe
he was drinking. he responded with a "huh.. yeah, red stripe..."
then walked away.

on top of the strange vibe from the guests,
we have been a bit disappointed with the "activities" list.
we scheduled two snorkel trips, a tour of "iguana island" and a trip to a sand dollar bar.
there was also talk of eco tours and boat trips.
yesterday we arrived at the boat dock for our first snorkel.

we were the only two scheduled for the trip.
our guides (two bros that didn't look any older than 18) sauntered up, yelling at
one another about who gets to keep the conch shell that they had collected earlier that morning.
they instructed that we "hop in" and we did so.
as one of them tossed a rope onto the dock, we began to pull away.
he looked at me and said, "lemme give yo twoo sam safety briefs"
(picture the most stereotypical accent you could come up with).
i nod. he points at a small compartment.
"da lifejackets is in der."
then he turned around and sat down next to his friend.

then we take off through the treacherous caribbean waters.
just as the boat begins to gain speed, we come to a screeching halt.
"sandbaarr..." the 'boat captain' mumbles.
then we dodge a few reefs, take out some unsuspecting coral,
and i nearly pee my pants. a few times.
we come to an abrupt stop and one of the bros slings the anchor straight onto a reef.
my heart is now stinging.
they put down the ladder and say, "here ya gow. hop in."
we awkwardly put on our masks and i asked if they had any anti-fog.
one of them grabbed my mask, and squirted some dawn dish detergent inside.
then he rinsed it.
in the ocean.
again- my heart.
i jump into the water and my heart goes from sad to broken.
the reef is dead. like totally dead.
we swam around in circles for about 20 minutes and after seeing nearly nothing,
we came back to the boat.

the guys said "see any sharks?"
"nope..." i chuckled, "do you see sharks often?"
"nahh" he says, "but der be a few beeg ones in der! we once seen a tigah shahk- man he be like
eight feet long! he filled up da whooole truck!"
"oh so you caught him?" i ask
"yah!! but don worry- we ate im too.."
"you ate a tiger shark?" (my eyes widen)
"yah! tigah shahk is gooood! we don waste it..."

quickly after this conversation,
we realize the sand dollar bar is getting completely POURED on- lighting, thunder, the whole nine.
so our guides suggest that we skip it and do it tomorrow.
"iz all da same ting! you doin iguana tomarrow- wez takin you der too! we can sand dollar after dat."
"sure!" (at this point i'm ready to be off dis boat.)

as soon as we dock, the rain hits.
and it hasn't stopped since!

last night we decided to head back to the poirot bar.
let me clarify the poirot thing.
this is hercule poirot:
he is the main character of the agatha christie novels and movies.
the movies are all set in places that look EXACTLY like the parrot cay resort.

anywho, we headed back to the bar where an adorable bar tender served us martinis and snacks.
 the martinis are embarrassingly expensive,
but we treated ourselves to a couple.
 sweet bartender snapped a photo of us.
 ange requested tobasco,
and she laughed at him.
 the bar would be quite a happening place to be, if the people staying here didn't
avoid social interaction like the plague.
 this morning we woke to overcast skies.
 which quickly turned to rain/thunder/lighting filled skies!
 we're going a tad bit stir crazy.
 i mean, its a monsoon up in hurre.

in light of our consistent disappointments and andrew's persistent illness,
we have decided to end our trip a few days early.
andrew demanded we speak with the manager and try to get some of the things we missed compensated.
i told him he was wasting his breath, but that i would tag along for the convo.
the sweet and precious hotel manager came out and sat down with us.
and andrew turned on his famous charm...
i have always known that andrew had charm (i mean, how do you think he snagged me??) :)
but today i really saw it in action.
before speaking to the manager, we had been told that nothing would be compensated.
after speaking to the manager, both nights would be compensated and we are being given a complimentary massage tomorrow morning before our departure!

so the moral of this story is:
the power behind andrew's eyes is greater than we had ever imagined.
snorkeling in parrot cay is depressing and bordering dangerous.
and we can't handle a vacation with you guys along for the ride!

see you back in the lone star state!!


day two in paradise

so i finally had time to load up my photos last night.
here we are on the first night, eating our room service like zombies.
here's that huge white couch i mentioned:
the vaulted ceilings make the room feel so fresh and open.
and those big doors open all the way up!
when we arrived there was a bottle of champagne on ice.
we were half asleep, but couldn't resist a cold glass of bubbly..
and yes, we drank the rest the next morning- flat champagne for breakfast.
here's our room.
the bed is shockingly comfortable!
champagne time!
(i know..)
there's me in a mirror!
soooooo sleepy....
we woke up wednesday morning to beautiful sunny skies!
we headed straight to the beach.
i slapped on my barefoot sandals-
honeymoon edition!
andrew started snapping photos of me down the beach..
so i started sprinting toward him.
luckily we got the whole thing in photo.

wait wait wait...
let's zoom/enhance that second one:
so that's the face i make when i run?

all our photos will look like this next one throughout the week.
the other guests at this hotel are old, not friendly, and spend most of their time with their faces buried into their copy of people magazine, or 50 shades of gray.
not the most fun group of people ever.
but we are having enough fun for all of them!
back on our porch now.
andrew is looking good!
and there's me.
these little guys are all over the place.
i think they are so cute.
as promised, i snapped a couple photos at the restaurant.
what a view, right?!
andrew went through a few of these bowls.
(chopped habenero and jalapenos)
we wandered around and stopped by the main lobby.
i like the big wrap around porches.
back to the beach.
there we are!
everywhere the colors are amazing.
and they completely change when the sun starts to set.

and again, we return to our porch.
just in time for sunset!
those green leaves just totally light up at this hour.
what a cozy cottage!
the tall feathery grass is so peaceful.

and so are the clouds.

wednesday night we had a special night planned.
we had reserved the "spa cottage" for the evening.
basically, this includes:
a couples massage,
an hour to steam room and get ready,
a romantic candlelit dinner for two,
and an hour to spoon on the daybed with a bottle of champagne.

i nearly died when i walked in and realized it looked like
the set of the bachelor.
rose petal/floating tea light filled bathtub?!
i wasn't entirely shocked to find it was ice cold.
here's the daybed where i would try to convince andrew that i was better than all the other bitches on the show (if we were on the bachelor).
but alas!
it wasn't meant to be.
about halfway through the massage, andrew began to feel not good.
his tumbly got rumbly and he got reaaaaally nauseous.
he tried to muscle through, but soon it became very obvious that he had food poisoning.
we had our guy cling wrap our food and send it to the room.
while i sampled all of it, andrew took pepto and hated life.
i closed out the night with some creme brulee in bed,
and inside the nfl.
so romantic!

sweet andrew was so sad to have missed a lovely evening.
he sleepily and sickly asked me to go take a photo of myself in the mirror-
since i looked so pretty!
haha he is even sweet when he's sick!
today is a better for ange.
can't wait to catch you up on what comes next!
see you tomorrow!